When I left for exchange, I was hoping to be able to overcome my finnishness. I didn’t think it would a problem at all. Some time into the exchange I realised finnishness is something that is definitely a part of me. It is hard to get rid of – and is there really any point in doing that? Of course it is good to improve oneself as much as is comfortable, but it is important to let yourself be you.
Usually I realise my finnishness when hanging out in big groups. Suddenly I feel frustration for having to be in the situation with no escape, I feel I would rather be by myself – it can be a bit painful even. Everyone else seems to really enjoy chatting in big groups and to have no problem with it so I guess it is a part of being Finnish. I noticed I missed the peace and calm found in the Finnish nature, alone in the forest looking over a lake…
For a while I was disappointed in myself for not being able to overcome my nature. Accepting finnishness as a part of me was important, also letting myself have time alone. It is okay to be a Finn! Luckily most foreign students happily accept different kinds of people and are so social themselves that I started feeling at home anyway and made friends – despite my finnishness.
I think Finnish people really respect each other, this is an important part of why we are a bit shy. Being quiet or reserved around others is usually seen as impoliteness but Finns actually do it out of the exact opposite reason: they wish to let others be. Usually Finns are very talkative when you approach them first – they just do not want to disturb anyone’s peace.
Problem is, not-Finnish people often do not understand or experience this need to be at peace from others, so it can be hard to get the mindset of a Finn. But just coming to chat with us usually solves the dilemma. Befriending a Finn might sometimes be hard at first, but it is well worth the time.
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